RORPS 2nd Edition Chapter 1: Introduction Hola all you psychos out there, and welcome to the grand 2nd Edition of the RORPS game! In case you are new to RORPS, there are a few basic things you should know before you continue reading. RORPS is the Really Odd Role Playing System...and some could say that "Odd" is an understatement. RORPS is also a universal system, usable in any setting and any genre. The only limit on what it can do is your own imagination...and if you are playing RORPS in the first place, that is probably pretty twisted. Why a 2nd Edition? Simple...all good games have them. Look at the world's most successful games; AD&D has a 2nd Edition, as does every one of White Wolf's Storyteller games. A 2nd Edition seems to have more "appeal" than a 1st Edition. Also, there were some minor changes that we had to make in the RORPS rules, to further simplify the system. These rules were heavily thought about by the four members of the RORPS design team, known as the RORPS CORPS. Playing RORPS RORPS is a roleplaying game. If you don't know how to roleplay or don't know what it is, go read some other book to find out. Due to the fact that I am really lazy, this book will not contain an explanation of roleplaying for newbies. Now to the meaty stuff. RORPS is extremely flexible, and can be used for any type of game you can imagine...except a serious one. Make sure not to drink any liquids while reading and/or playing RORPS, due to the fact that they may jettison themselves through your nostrils, causing either damage to your keyboard or severe nasal injury. RORPS is designed so that the people playing it can have a good time, and get away from the typical serious/angsty/apocalyptic games. The system is not designed for ongoing games and campaigns, but more for one-shot breaks from the norm. Before you play RORPS, however, you should get used to some of the lingo used. The following is a list of RORPS vocabulary. Make sure to study it, because there will be a quiz five minutes before the first game session. Failure results in immediate execution. RORPS Lingo CowMaster: The CowMaster is the referee of the game, the one who creates the worlds, sets the scenes, and controls the enemies. Other names for the CowMaster include Storyteller or Gamemaster. Abbreviated as CM. Oddity Points: Oddity Points gauge a character's roleplaying and weirdness throughout the game. These points are a great way to determine just how odd you actually are. Ouch Points: Ouch Points are used to determine how much damage a character has taken. These are the equivalent of Hit Points in some other games. Poopy Stuffs: All characters have their flaws...the Poopy Stuffs are a characters weaknesses, problems, and drawbacks. Race: Everything belongs to a race. This one is kinda self-explanatory. Skill: All characters have Skills. These are the abilities and areas that a character excels in. See the character creation and rules sections for more info on Skills. Stuff Points: Stuff Points are gained through gameplay and represent a character's experience and learning. These may be spent to raise Traits and Skills. Trait: All characters have the four base Traits of Buffness, Hair Color, Breath, and Bowel Control. These determine the base ability your character has in fields such as strength, charisma, and sanity. Waste-of-Time: An ongoing RORPS campaign. Chapter 2: Character Creation In order to play RORPS, all players must have a character. Characters are the player's alter-ego in the RORPS universe that the CowMaster has created, and they are usually extremely odd. To create a character, one should first think of a concept. A concept is just a few words or a sentence that describes the overall character, such as "retired salon manager" or "arrogant hobo" or "hitman from Hell." There is no limit to the concepts you can choose from...you can play any sort of concept you want. After a concept is thought up, the character creation process continues. Just follow these easy steps, and then you are done! Step 1: Race All characters belong to a race. This determines the character's social and ethical background, and what he looks like as well. There are many races, but CowMasters should feel free to design more as they wish. Each race has a Special Ability. This should be recorded right after choosing the race, since it is important during game play. For more info on Special Abilities, see the rules section. The following races are the ones used in the core rules. The text following them is their Special Ability. Amish Wookie - Can destroy all the evil technology after a few good whacks. Angel of SPAM - Can use divine powers to make SPAMburgers look tasty. Bubble Wrap - Can make cool poppy noises. Chef Boyardee - Gets to wear a cool hat. Deranged Janitor - Can secretly plot to take over the world while mopping. Disco Era Refugee - Can dance like an idiot at nightclubs. Duck - Can quack and leave droppings on people's heads. Duke of Hazzard - Can wreck cars...with style. Granola Bar - Can come in a variety of flavors. Groping President - Can have a secret affair with any intern. Howard Stern - Character is the king of all media. Illegal Immigrant - Can work for under minimum-wage. Mr. Potato Head - Can rework his appearance as long as he has his bag of parts. Muppet - Can get paid lots of money for doing cheesy movies and kids specials. Pimp Daddy - Can dress like a dork and still look cool. Power Ranger - Can attract the loyalty of all small children. Psychic Ice Cream Sundae - Can resist melting by using shields made of solid telekinetic force and wards made of pure metapsionic energy. Rabid TSRO - Can /kill annoying snerts (TSR Live in-joke). Rappin' Rabbi - Can write some funky hymns. RoboSnert - Can clear a chatroom in under 30 seconds. Senior Editor of Cosmopolitan - Can diss men and get away with it. Sock Puppet - Can control all those who insert their hand up its butt. Spicy Pepper - Can give people indigestion. Yodeling Polka Demon - Can yodel till Hell freezes over. Yuppie - Can order mocha at any time, even during severe weather conditions. Step 2: Traits The basic abilities of all RORPS characters are represented by their Traits. Each character has the four main Traits of Buffness, Breath, Hair Color, and Bowel Control. Buffness represents physical speed, strength, and endurance. Breath determines the character's social skills and charisma. Hair Color is the character's intelligence and wit, and Bowel Control is the character's sanity and will. Beginning characters have 10 points to distribute among the four main Traits, with a minimum of 1 in each and a maximum of 4. The following chart determines the basic features of your character, determined by his ratings in the Traits. Buffness Breath Hair Color Bowel Control 4 Pro-wrestler Minty Fresh Bald Young'in 3 Ninja Refreshing Brunette Teen 2 Boxer Average Redhead Adult 1 Pansy Mint? Blonde Geezer Note that when a character is created and his Traits features are recorded, these may never change, even if the Trait's rating is increased (so if a character begins with Bowel Control 2, Adult, and then increases his Bowel Control rating to 3, he is still an Adult). Step 3: Skills Skills are what characters are good at, and are usually the most fun part of character creation. Skills are usually very odd, but all have a normal meaning as well. Skills are set up in the following matter: Humorous, stupid skill / related, real skill: rating So, an example skill might be: Hit a grand slam with a 20lb codfish / athletics: 3 It's as simple as that. Characters begin with 10 points to divide among Skills, but no Skill can begin with a rating higher than 4. Step 4: Poopy Stuf Poopy Stuffs are the inherent flaws that most characters have. These represent drawbacks, weaknesses, and deformities that make life harder for the character. Beginning characters may buy up to 5 points worth of Poopy Stuffs, but are not required to buy any. For a detailed explanation on how Poopy Stuffs work rules-wise, see the rules section. The following is a complete list of Poopy Stuffs. CowMasters should feel free to create their own if they wish. 1 point Poopy Stuffs: Big Hairy Feet, Big Rear End, Bow Legged, Braces, Cross Eyes, Greasy Hair, Hairy Knuckles, Huge Adam's Apple, Knobby Knees, Left Handed, Malformed Elbow, No Eyebrows, Receding Hairline, Two Left Feet 2 point Poopy Stuffs: Acne, Addiction to Star Wars, Allergic to Gameshow Hosts, Allergic to Lint, Attached Earlobes, Compulsion for Crushing Grapes, False Teeth, Fetish for Pink Golfballs, Huge Beer Belly, Phobia of Country Music, Prosthetic Knuckle, Slight Resemblance of Bob Barker 3 Point Poopy Stuffs: Allergic to Cheese, Compulsion for Eating Small Furry Things, Fetish for Uncooked Fish, Fleas, Lice, Mangy, Milkdud-Shaped Head, Sunburn, Phobia of Backhair, Pitstench, Prosthetic Nostril, Uncontrollable Bladder 4 Point Poopy Stuffs: Addiction to Anti-Freeze, Compulsion for Singing Polka, Great Resemblance of Bob Barker, Midget, Phobia of All Things Chia, Prosthetic Butt, Purple Dinosaur Magnet 5 Point Poopy Stuffs: Hanson Brother, Uncontrollable Tongue, You are Bob Barker Step 5: Oddity Points and Ouch Points This step is probably the simplest step. All characters begin with 10 Oddity Points and 12 Ouch Points. Oddity Points represent just how weird your character is, and gauge your roleplaying. Ouch Points represent just how tough your character is, and gauge how much damage you have taken. Step 6: Stuff Points Every character is unique, and some have advantages that others do not. Stuff Points allow you to further customize your character, adding Skills, Traits, or other Stuff. Characters begin with a base of 10 Stuff Points, plus the number of points of Poopy Stuffs they selected (i.e.. a character with 4 points of Poopy Stuffs has 14 Stuff Points to spend). Stuff Points are spent in the following ways: 1. Characters may spend 4 Stuff Points to raise any Trait by one point. Only the Trait's rating goes up, not the feature (a character with Bowel Control 1 who raises it to a 2 is still a Geezer). No Trait may begin higher than 4. 2. Characters may spend 2 Stuff Points to raise any Skill by one point, or to buy a new Skill. Now Skill may begin higher than 4. 3. Characters may spend 1 Stuff Point to receive 100 Yen. Characters may buy equipment ("Stuff") with their Yen, using the following costs. Stuff Cost Weapon 100 Yen Vehicle 300 Yen Minor Tech 100 Yen Major Tech 400 Yen Weapons include all types of weapons, meaning a plungers costs the same as a howitzer. Vehicles, just like weapons, can be anything, meaning a sherman tank costs the same as roller skates. Minor Tech includes things like toasters, cell phones, and walkmans, while Major Tech includes stuff like laptops, time machines, and motorized whiffleball bats. Step 7: Other Stuff Now is when you really get to be creative. This is the section where you get to determine the details of your character. What does he look like? Where is he from? What important things have happened in his life? What enemies does he have? You don't have to answer all of these questions, but a brief physical description and history might be required by some CMs. Chapter 3: Rules All games have rules. While your imagination and your character's stats determine what you can do, the rules determine how you can do it. This chapter includes rules for determining the outcome of actions, combat, character development, and more! Read on, and before you know it, you too will be playing the oddest game ever!! Die Rolls Whenever a character tries an action that has a chance of failure, the CM can call for a die roll. Not every action requires a die roll, however. Since tying your shoelaces is a simple act, it is an automatic success, no die roll needed. But, if your character is trying to tie his shoelaces while in the middle of a gun fight, blindfolded, and strapped to an atomic bomb, a die roll should be called for. Just follow the following easy steps to see if your action succeeds when a die roll is called for. 1. After listening to what you want to do, the CM determines the Check number of the action. This is the overall difficulty of the action. Low Check Numbers mean that characters will probably succeed, while high Check Numbers mean that the character will probably fail. Below is a guide to the difficulty each Check Number represents. Difficulty of Action Check Number So-easy-you-could-do-it-blindfolded 2 Cakewalk 3 Easy 4 Moderate 5 Difficult 6 Hard 7 Really Hard 8 Incredibly Hard 9 Stupid Hard 10 If the action you are attempting directly involves any of your Special Abilities, then the Check Number is lowered by 1 points (i.e.. An Amish Wookie trying to smash a robot). 2. After determining the Check Number, the CM decides what Trait you should roll. This depends on the action you are trying. Below are examples of what Traits should be rolled for what situations. Buffness: Any physical action, physical intimidation, combat Bowel Control: Sanity, willpower, memory, working HTML Breath: Charisma, verbal intimidation, seduction, fast-talking Hair Color: Solving puzzles, using technology, mental tasks 3. Next, roll a number of dice equal to the Trait you are rolling. So, if you are trying to lift a heavy cow, and you have a Buffness of 3, you roll 3 dice. RORPS uses 6-sided dice and nothing else. 4. Look at the results, and set aside the highest-rolled die. Look over your Skills and see if any Skills are applicable to the situation (i.e.. If you have the Wiggle Ears Without Using Hands/Intimidation Skill and are trying to intimidate someone). Add the rating of that Skill to the highest rolled die (i.e.. If you have the above Skill with a rating of 2, and the highest rolled die was a 4, your total is a 6). 5. If you have any Poopy Stuffs that are applicable to the situation (i.e.. Convincing someone that you are not Bob Barker when you have the You Are Bob Barker Poopy Stuff), subtract the Poopy Stuff's point value from the result. 6. If the final result is equal-to-or-higher-than the Check Number, your action succeeds!! If not, it fails. NOTE- When rolling on Step 3, if the highest-rolled die is either a 1 or a 2, your action automatically fails, no matter what Skills are added. Example of Die Rolls: Biffo is trying to impress the ladies. Since these ladies just happen to be high-society supermodels, Biffo's CM rules that the Check Number is 8. Biffo rolls his Breath, which is what should be rolled for an action like this, which has a rating of 3. Biffo rolls 3 6-sided dice, and gets a 2, a 1, and a 6. Next, looking over his Skills, Biffo sees that he has the Make Cool Kneecap Noises/Charm Skill with a rating of 2. He adds the highest result (6) to the Skill's rating (2), which equals 8. But alas! Biffo has Acne, which is a 2 point Poopy Stuff! Biffo takes the 8 and subtracts the point value of the Poopy Stuff (2) and gets his final result...a 6. Since the Check Number was 8 and Biffo only rolled a 6, his seduction attempt fails. It looks like Biffo is going to be lonely tonight... Combat Combat is an important part to all roleplaying games. It's inevitable that characters in RORPS will get into some scraps, and need to defend themselves and thrash the bad guys. The following section details how to run RORPS combat. All fights in RORPS are divided into rounds. Each round has the same sequence of events, but each round is different because the characters will try different things each time. The following steps detail how the rounds go and how to handle combat. 1. All characters in the round add their Buffness and Hair Color ratings to determine their initiative. The character with the highest total goes first, in descending order. In case of a tie (which will probably happen), all characters with the same result go at the same time. 2. The character with highest initiative announces who he is attacking and describes his attack. The character rolls his Buffness, Check Number 5, and figures in any applicable Skills or Poopy Stuffs. If the attack succeeds, he does damage to the target. 3. The CM, after hearing the description of the attack, rates it on the following scale. Each rating has a number beside it, which is how many points an attack of that rating subtracts from a foe's Ouch Point total. "Groan" attacks are anything along the lines of "I punch him," and "Salted Paper Cut" attacks are those attacks that actually turn your stomach to hear described. Rating Damage Groan 1 Ouch 2 Arg! 3 Aaaaaaaaah! 4 That Really Hurt! 5 Oh My God! 6 The Pain, the Pain! 7 AAAAAAAAHHH! 8 I Feel Cold... 9 Salted Paper Cut 10 4. After the character with the highest initiative makes his attack, all other characters repeat the above process until all are done with their actions. Then they all go back to Step 1... Example of Combat: Biffo wants to kill JoJo the Magic Clown. Biffo add his Buffness (3) and his Hair Color (3) for an initiative of 6. JoJo add his Buffness (2) and his Hair Color (2) for an initiative of 4. Biffo goes first. Biffo rolls his Buffness of 3 against a Check Number of 5, and gets a 2, a 3, and a 4. He looks over his Skills and sees Hit a Grandslam with a 20lb Codfish/Melee: 2, and adds that to his highest result for a total of 6, which beats the Check Number. Biffo's attack against JoJo is successful. Biffo describes his attack. "I wind up my bladed whiffle ball bat, and using all of my force, I shove it up his hinder hole and savagely twist!" The CM, after listening to the description, rates this attack as an Oh My God! which subtracts 6 Ouch Points from JoJo's total. But, since JoJo only had 2 Ouch Points remaining after his little encounter with the dreaded tissue box earlier, he falls, dead as a doornail. Character Death and Healing Characters in the RORPS universe are usually in pain. In fact, they only heal at two times throughout the game. Between adventures, a character regains all of his Ouch Points, bringing him back up to his full total. Players should ask the CM after each session to see if they heal, because some adventures might take more than one session to complete. The other time a character heals his wounds is when he dies. Whenever a character loses all of his Ouch Points, he falls over, dead. But, since all RORPS characters are actually fairies from Never-NeverLand, there is hope. If all other players begin clapping their hands really fast, the dead character springs back to life with full Ouch Points. Oddity Points Oddity Points measure a characters roleplaying during the game. They can also be used to gauge how odd the character's player really is, as well. All characters have 10 Oddity Points in the beginning, but this total will sometimes fall during gameplay. However, 10 is the top limit for Oddity Points; a character can never, under any circumstances, have more than 10 Oddity Points. Oddity Points are lost for the following: 1. If a character roleplays badly, boringly, or just doesn't roleplay, he loses an amount of Oddity Points of the CM's choosing. 2. Whenever a character hits a foe with an attack of the "Groan" rating, he loses one Oddity Point. 3. Oddity Points may be spent to gain an extra die on any action. Only one point may be spent per turn, however. Oddity Points are gained for the following: 1. If a character roleplays great, oddly, and is involved in the game, he gains an amount of Oddity Points of the CM's choosing. 2. If a character hits a foe with an attack of the "Salted Paper Cut" rating, he gains one Oddity Point. Oddity Points also limit the character. If a character's Oddity Points are low, then he is "normal." A character may never roll more dice for an action than his current total of Oddity Points (i.e.. A character with 2 Oddity Points remaining can roll a maximum of 2 dice for any action). If a character ever loses all of his Oddity Points, his body parts begin to explode at random until he is completely gone and dead. Not even clapping can resurrect him. Character Development In RORPS, just like in any roleplaying game, characters have the chance to grow and change. This is shown through the accumulation of Stuff Points. These Points are spent to raise stats and buy stuff. After each session each character gains a number of Stuff Points determined using the following guidelines. Stuff Points Gained Player Roleplayed Okay 1 Player Roleplayed Good 2 Player Roleplayed Super 3 CM Laughed a Little 1 CM Laughed a Lot 2 CM's Sides Split 3 CM's Sides Split, literally 20 Player Roleplayed Badly lose 1 point Player Didn't Pay Attention lose 2 points Player Played Side Games of Magic lose 3 points Player Played Side Games of Spellfire lose 20 points and get beaten Players may spend their Stuff Points in the following matter: Raise a Trait: current rating times 4 Raise a Skill: current rating times 2 New Skill: 3 Buy New Vehicle: 3 Buy New Weapon: 1 Buy New Minor Tech: 1 Buy New Major Tech: 4 Buy 100 Yen: 1 No Trait or Skill can ever be raised above 5 (Walker, Texas Ranger level) Chapter 3: CowMastering CowMastering RORPS can be a tough job. The CM not only has to make settings, characters, and plots, but he also has to make them weird. Oddity is what RORPS is about, and if it isn't odd, it isn't RORPS. This chapter contains info for CowMasters so that they can learn how to best play RORPS. Just read on for guidelines for setting design, advanced rules, and some other cool stuff. Pointless Rules It's a known fact that some roleplayers like precise rules, such as movement rates and throwing ranges and other things like that. While RORPS is, at heart, an extremely simple system, some CMs who play it might like to make it a little more complex. But keep in mind that if you choose to add some of these rules, you do not have to add them all, and may change things around. It's your game after all, so include the rules you want. This next section details some of these rules. Movement Rates Characters in RORPS can move, just like in any other game. Sometimes this information is important, but it usually is pretty dumb to record movement rates. Use the chart below to see how fast a character can move in various ways. A character, no matter, what his movement rate is, can never move more feet in one turn than his current Ouch Point total (i.e.. If a character can normally move 12 feet, but only has 6 Ouch Points remaining, he can only move 6 feet). Mode of movement Rate SprintBuffness times 6 RunBuffness times 4 WalkBuffness times 3 SwimBuffness times 2 Flying (with wings)Buffness times 4 Throwing Ranges All characters will want to throw something every now and then, whether it be grenades, grapes, or even other characters. A character may throw any object a number of feet equal to his Buffness times a variable, determined by the size of the object. If the object is something meant to be thrown far (javelin, paper airplane, plunger, etc.), add 5 feet to the range. Object Being Chucked Range Small Objects (stones, dice, cats, etc.)Buffness times 8 Normal Objects (rocks, basketballs, etc.)Buffness times 7 Large Objects (other people, furniture, etc.)Buffness times 4 Huge Objects (boulders, semitrucks, etc.)Buffness times 1/2 Multiple Tasks If a character wants to be able to shoot a gun and tie his shoes in the same turn, then he should be able to. Characters may take more than one action per turn, with the CMs approval, but they may not take any more actions in a turn than their rating in Bowel Control (i.e.. A character with Bowel Control 2 can take 2 actions). However, doing so gets the character a penalty, as the Check Number increases by one, cumulatively (i.e.. A character who is taking 3 actions with a Check Number of 5 on each has a Check Number of 5 for the first action, 6 for the second, and 7 for the third). Revised Combat Some people, believe it or not, actually like realistic combat. Although RORPS's combat system is mainly narrative, there are some ways to make it more realistic, but at the same time, a little more complicated. The following changes can be made to combat: 1. The CM may choose not to use 5 as the base Check Number, but to figure it using on of the following ways. The-Buffness-Way: Using this method, the Check Number for all attacks against any character is equal to his Buffness +2 (i.e.. If a character has a Buffness of 2, all attacks against him have a Check Number of 4). The-Weapon-Way: This method determines the Check Number by the weapon used in the attack. Use the following chart to determine Check Numbers based on weapons. Weapon Check Number Small Weapons (knives, roadkill, forks, etc.)4 Normal Weapons (bats, swords, plungers, etc.)5 Large Weapons (battle axes, rocket launchers, etc.)6 Huge Weapons (howitzers, elephants, etc.)7 2. CMs may wish to enforce the following rules, which represent stunning and knockouts due to heavy damage. A. If a character takes an amount of damage in one turn equal to his current Ouch Point total, he splats against the nearest wall. B. If a character takes an amount of damage in one turn equal to half of his current Ouch Point total, he must roll Buffness, Check Number equal to the amount of damage taken, to avoid being knocked out. C. If a character takes an amount of damage in one turn equal to one-quarter his current Ouch Point total, he must roll Buffness, Check Number equal to the amount of damage taken +1, to avoid falling down. Other Forms of Damage Characters can take damage from more than just other characters. They can be hit by cars, struck by lightning, or even have trees fall on them. It is simple to determine how much damage each of these outside damage sources inflict. Just use the damage rating system, and rate the damage on the chart (i.e.. A character gets struck by lightning while standing in a pond, and when the CM checks the chart, he rates this as an AAAAAAAAAAH! which inflicts 8 points of damage). Tips for Setting Design The setting that you play RORPS in is all up to you. Whatever you want, whether it's a far-future SPAMwar or a middle-ages stupidfest. The only limit on your settings is your imagination! Here are a few tips to help you through designing your setting. 1. Keep it simple. Nobody likes really complex stuff in RORPS, so stay away from lands full of politics and stuff like that. 2. Keep it odd. Nobody likes utter stupidity, and after all, that's not what RORPS is about. RORPS is about odd stuff. When creating settings, keep the really dumb stuff out and keep the odd little quirky things in. 3. Keep it original. Players will know if they are playing in a carbon-copy of Star Wars or something, so you should try to do your own settings with your own unique touch. Don't rip off what other people have done! 4. Celebrities make great supporting cast! Players can imagine what they look like, how they talk, and they usually add that odd touch to the game. The End Well folks, that's RORPS. I hope you like our creation, and if you do, keep an eye out for the upcoming RORPS supplements! We plan on doing sourcebooks for everything from combat styles to anime to breathmints, so be on the lookout for the new cool stuff!!!! And remember the one thing RORPS is about. Remember the one thing that we all must remember to get ahead in any situation. Remember the one thing that most people just won't do. Remember... DARE TO BE STUPID!!!!! Credits Writer: Duck of Doom Designers: Duck of Doom, Sinium, DMK, Ionaries,and Nute; together we are the RORPS CORPS Editor: A whole buttload of people. Original RORPS Concept: Duck of Doom Special Thanks to: Sinium (for the races), Ionaries (for the website), DMK (for something I probably forgot), Nute, Kendal, 0verseer, and all of our loyal fans. Official RORPS Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Shadowlands/9608/rorps.html